Developing endurance allows all of us to go the distance toward our goals and aspirations. And the best way to ensure success is to get comfortable with the notion of failing forward. Obviously, most people don’t wake up in the morning thinking about how they can botch things or fail to achieve their goals. However, if you’re never making mistakes then one thing is certain: You’re playing too small and not experimenting with expansive actions, or taking the necessary risks that allow you to learn and grow outside of your comfort zone. In these turbulent times when the only thing certain is uncertainty, it’s essential to be nimble and willing to explore strategic options, learn from your actions, and make necessary course corrections along the way. Parents, community activists, teachers, and executives share setbacks or challenges to model authenticity and vulnerability. When failure is discussed honestly, it strengthens teamwork by providing opportunities for individuals, organizations, and communities to grow smarter and stronger by learning from and helping each other which can mitigate the impact of future mishaps along the way.
Shame is one of the most pernicious emotions that diminishes personal and professional confidence. Shame stands for the misbelief that is reflected in the acronym: Should Have Already Mastered Everything. The best advice I ever received came from my parents and several supervisors who took the time to model humility and courage by explaining mistakes they had made and talking about what they learned from each experience. These honest interactions gave me permission to reach out for help when things were not going well on an important project instead of pretending that things were running smoothly until it was too late.
The adage “actions speak louder than words” rings true in relationships, business, and in life. It’s essential that your actions reflect your philosophy and your words because people resonate much more with what others actually do rather than when others tell them what they should do. That’s why when you embark in a new direction, launch a new initiative, or guide your family or colleagues forward it’s essential to model authenticity and transparency so that people can explore and learn from what works as well as to discuss and analyze what has not worked.
Let people know you care, especially in their time of need. When something happens in someone’s personal life—perhaps a family crisis, health challenge, or personal setback—it’s essential to let them know that you authentically care about them. That could mean taking a few minutes to leave a personal voicemail message, writing a handwritten note, or spending time listening and providing support. These moments when you take time to focus on a person’s real world challenges, giving them thoughtful consideration, leave a strong and lasting impression that the person is valued.
I am a passionary: a visionary driven by great passion and action. I love the thrill of doing bold and audacious things that enhance the lives of people who may be going through setbacks, challenges, or trauma in order to inspire them to take active roles in their self-healing to experience greater physical, emotional, and mental wellbeing. Being vulnerable and sharing experiences of times when things were overwhelming and stressful gives people permission to disclose what they might be going through. I also encourage people to explore past experiences when they were overwhelmed or in a difficult spot to see how they were able to move forward.
Often when people “mine for the good” they discover resources within themself and within others, using this epiphany to gather support and resources to help them in the present situation. I work hard and, when stress hits the fan, I like to use humor to diffuse tension among the Soaringwords team. I also tend to curse like a sailor, which I think makes me relatable with my team because no one wants to work for a one-dimensional person. (note: I never cursed in front of my children when they were growing up!) I also intentionally engage in a lot of self-care: working out each day, spending time with my family, reading, and devouring movies and New York theater. All of these endeavors inspire me and give me creative ideas to bring to Soaringwords.
So remember those little setbacks or stumbles are a wonderful opportunity to practice greater self-compassion. Sometimes we take two steps backward to take one step forward, but it’s all part of the process.
I’m sending you strength and love.
Soaringwords is the power to heal.